Groove is in the Heart

Loving My Own

Minyong. If there's anything in this world that I am most thankful for and truly proud of, it would be being the daughter of this genius.

Sample His Article

posted by Groove is in the Heart @ 10:49 PM 2 comments

Freyssinet on My Shoulder

Sometimes I just really hate people who are such a hassle. Extremely heavy. Pabigat sa buhay.

Heavy in such a way na:

- i cannot do what i want to do kasi nagpapa guilty
- i will tell him to screw up and that i'm gonna do what i want to do pero nonsense na din kasi talaga namang sira na ang buong araw ko sa init ng ulo
- puro pampaawa ang mga hirit

Or, hindi kaya I'm just a selfish, self-centered, insensitive bitch who only cares for the I, me and myself? Ugh.

posted by Groove is in the Heart @ 4:26 PM 1 comments

Ganda ng Lola Mo

Cheap finds are fabulous! For my bi-monthly beauty salon routine, I decided to check out Index Salon at BF Sucat. Ay, talk about really low-priced beauty treatments. I always go for hot oil and the orgasmic and stress-relieving manicure/pedicure and foot spa. So I always figure na kung no-frills lang naman na ganitong services eh chika na ang cheaper salons.

It's always interesting to watch other clients in the salon and try to analyze them. May mga cute, pretty, sexy, maputi, makinis.. at likewise, meron ding mga uglers na feeling cute at vain (kapal!), majubis, maitim, madungis, etc. etc. God forbid, pero ang sarap mag judge eh. Heehee. I'm sure ako din jina-judge nila noh? But never. Fuckers.

Also, as I always enjoy visits to the beauty salon, I always like to put myself in the position of the salon staff. What if my job 6x a week for 9 hours was to make kuskus all the thickest callouses of the people of the world? Saya ko ba? Or what if I was the senior stylist trying to upsell the latest method of hair straightening to a client who has the world's most chemically damaged hair? Or take the shampooist who does nothing but scrub bumbumnans of all scents, shapes and sizes all day. Or what if I was the most preferred hair waxer in the salon? Kaya ko pa bang hugasan at sabunin ang kilikili at keplers ko pag uwi ng bahay? Ayoko lang makakita ng bolivia noh? Or better yet, ever eat dried pusit or sinigang sa bayabas. Eeewww.

As a result, I always end up very pitiful for these hard-working salon staff. Kaya naman binabawi ko na lang sa tip. Not naman to brag noh. It melts my heart everytime I see their faces light up after I give them my gratuity. Eh pano siguro nga dahil cheap lang ang singil ng salon, ang mga clients, may pagka cheapler din at pati mga staff eh binabarat. Kawawa naman. Eh kung ikaw nga kaya ang gumawa ng trabaho nila? Unless na lang you really have the penchant for customer service and find pure delight in scrubbing kalyos and trimming dead nails. (Oopss, beep beep disc chums!) Pero diba? A little bit of generosity naman here.

Once in a while, let's be thankful for the kind of work we got. Whether it's a job, a career, a passion.. anything.

So tomorrow, I'm all psyched up to go back to work with a brighter attitude na tipong "Yeah, I love my job!". Pero shar, on my next day off, takbo na naman ako sa parlor para magpa kulkol ng paa't kamay. Kasi I'm a slave to my job, it sucks, and I need an outlet for relaxation. Same old routine, same old stress reliever, same old temporary enlightenment of the spirit. Geez.

posted by Groove is in the Heart @ 10:33 PM 0 comments

Blame It On Starbucks

Had a short 'n sweet time with my chummies this evening. Short hang lang because may kanya kanyang stuff to do pa after. Monster out to catch this American Idol guy Constantine at Greenbelt (with Mario)..Ets to pack pa for her Subic business trip..Punk couple to watch Itchyworms (sino ba talaga sila????).. Gigi and Din, wala lang, just homelers.

We ate at fuck, i forget the name (ang tanda ko na talaga).. basta this Chinese restaurant at Walter mart. Chika lang the food, nothing really spectacular. Then a quick "capping the chums gathering" at Starbucks, also in Waltermart. I had cheesecake and my all-time favorite, white chocolate mocha. Tang ina di lang ako makatulog ngayon ah. I so want to sleep naman na eh. Dami ko na na-surf sa internet but yes, my eyes are very owl-like. Fuck this.

Okay, some issues here. Why is it that everytime I check out my friends at friendster, I end up quite depressed. Actually, alam ko naman ang reason eh. I'm just trying to be trivial. Hee.

A lot of my friends, former batchmates, former colleagues are "Status: Married". Pota. And then you click on their pictures and you'll see images of babies, wedding shots, out of town shots. Pota. Hate it. I so wanna be like that naman eh. And then a lot of them have migrated to the States or Canada na. Fuck. How nice the background and sceneries in their pictures. But of course sa loob loob ko, tang ina hirap lang ng buhay doon noh. Kayod kalabaw. And i'm sure they're also occasionally being discriminated because they're brown. If you're not naman hirap na hirap sa buhay, life in our native motherland is still priceless. Walang ganito sa States.

Ay nako. Ayan kasi gising ng gising pa kaya lots of thoughts noh. Fuck.

Back to friendster.. there's this thing you can do na "Send a Smile". Ay. Parang puwede ito pang pasok Din ah. Kaso very loser naman ang dating. Although if I'm correct, sa friendster naka hook up etong si Monster ha. Loser nga lang yung nakuha niya. Hi Monst! Hhhmmm.. Hee.

Fuck nonsense na ito. I'm an owl. I will suffer tomorrow :-( So help me God.

posted by Groove is in the Heart @ 12:50 AM 3 comments

My Heart's Christmas Wishlist

I'd like to believe na I have sooo much love to give in this world. Di nga, promise. I love so many people kasi eh.

Prime examples:
1. Sam
I consider Sam a.k.a. Kanoochie as my one true love. Akala ko talaga ikakasal kami. Or baka tanga lang ako. Hello, Din?! 9 out of 10 people na nga ang nagsasabi na long distance relationship don't work diba? Eh si Din, feeling kinaya pero not si Kanooch. So major bigo si Din, pero never nawala sa isip niya si Kanooch, until this day. Not naman to the point na hanggang ngayon umiiyak noh. Exagg iyon. More of "kamusta na kaya siya?". Yan, always ganyan. Or when driving home from a hard day's work, ipapatugtog niya ang theme song niya kay Sam na "A Thousand Miles" by Vanessa Carlton. Yan, pampa-relax lang ba na may halong reminiscing ng past. Cheese ba? Eh so what noh.

2. Abu
Si Abu ang root cause kung bakit I love men in uniform. Ibang dating nila eh. Mga bad boy image ba. Tipong babarugin ka muna bago ka haplos haplusin. Well, actually bilib na bilib lang ako kay Uba kasi since CSA and CRC days pa namin, sinasabi na niya na dream talaga niya maging sundalo. And then, just when he was a few months shy from graduating sa CRC, tumungo na siyang Baguio para mag PMA. Galing no? And now, he's with the Philippine Airforce na. Tom Cruise ng buhay ko. I think kayang i-jackie and Abu-Din relationship eh. Kaso hirap na naman. Long distance things kasi he can be based anywhere. Lipa. Cebu. Fuck. Never. But what's nice about Uba is when he's in town, he'd text and make yaya na we go out for a drink. Last time nag coffee kami sa SLEX. Kilig lang ako noh. But then after 3 days, fly out na siya to Cebu. Sigh. So, in my thoughts na rin lang si Uba.

3. Pasky
Pasky is my most tragic relationship. Siguro naman lahat tayo nasaksihan sa telebisyon at dyaryo and failed Oakwood Mutiny nung July 27, 2003 noh? Yan, yan si Yksap at ang kanilang tropa. Yung frustrations ko kasi kay Abu, naibuhos ko kay Pasky. Pasky is the quite type pero pare, ang tikas kakaiba. Very Pinoy and dating. Laki ng katawan, moreno (actually, very maitim) at may ka-guapuhan. Sarap. Basta, he's the definition of MACHO. Eh it so happens, tougher in skills pa pala itong si Yksap kaysa kay Uba. Si Yksap kasi ay isang SWAG or tinatawag na Special Warfare Group. Sila ang naririnig nating Navy Seals. So, kakaiba ang soldier talents. Sarap. Eh kaso nga, jailer. So after 2 years of bringing weekly groceries and ulam sa jailhouse rock, gumive up na si Din. Pero we're still friends. As in the love is still there, kaso paalam na si Din kung puwede na mag move on. Hirap kasi umasa sa sa walang katiyakan diba?

4. Elie
One word lang masasabi ko when it comes to Elie. Companionship. Actually, pumasok si Elie sa panahon na lungkot na lungkot na ko sa situation namin ni Yksap. Eh nung minsan sa isang function ko, habang nagse-setup eh may narining akong nagsasalitang Ilocano na maitim at macho. Ay, hindi kaya siya kapatid ni Pasky? Yun. Pasok Elie na. Si Elie.. si Elie who was there to fetch me from work. Si Elie who keeps me company kumain sa G4 foodcourt at magpalipas oras dahil ayokong umuwi ng maaga sa Alabang at aabutan ko lang na kumakain si Encar at Mark na hindi ko kabatian. Si Elie who makes me yaya to hear mass on Sundays. Si Elie who's my kasama to watch any cheezy movie sa sinehan. Si Elie. Siya ang pumuno ng oras, panahon at physical presence na hindi magampanan ni Yksap. And now, si Elie na katabi ko sa pagtulog, kayakap. Si Elie na handyman namin ni yaya sa bahay. Si Elie na kasa-kasama ko every morning papasok to work, mag grocery, mag derma, etc, etc. Si Elie. My source of comfort and security. Di ko yata kaya without him.

Hhaaayyy.. ang sarap magmahal, despite the craziness of all of it. Posible nga ba yun na ang dami mong mahal at the same time? I'd say YES. Carry. As in yes - yes yes yo. Kasi ito ang nafi-feel ko everyday eh.

Although at times na sa sobrang love na nafi-feel ko for all of them, madalas kinukulang ako sa disc space. Sana may nabibiling memory card for my big, tender, juicy heart. Para pag memory full na, pasak lang ng panibago diba? At with bigger MB. Kayanin na din kaya if we're talking about GB?

Or better yet, sana may heart reserve tayo na built in na sa katawan natin. Para pag yung heart laspag na sa kaka feel ng love or super sakit na due to heartaches and frustrations, mapapalitan kaagad ng brand new. Parang pag flat tire ba. Diba ang kotse laging may reserbang gulong? Ganun lang. Simple diba?

posted by Groove is in the Heart @ 8:52 PM 4 comments

Material Girl

I love it! I was bored today at work and decided to go to Glorietta during my 1-hour lunch break. And what did I do? Powershop. It's a quickie, like powersleep. What I bought were basically nonsense stuff. All wants and not needs. It gives me a false sense of happiness and satisfaction. And it's only when my credit card bill arrives that I'll realize for the 400 millionth time how foolish I am. Totally.

But right now, who cares? I'm happy. I love this feeling. Very shallow, but so fucking what?. Never. Deadma. Perhaps after two or three days, I'll feel overworked again, and in despair. So I'll run to the mall again, and again, and again. Material things to feed boredom, loneliness and insecurity. I just love it!

posted by Groove is in the Heart @ 4:15 PM 0 comments

Adoption, Anyone?

Since I decided to live on my own and moved to Tinzel Homes in May 2005, I knew that I had to prepare myself for major adjustments. One of this is accepting that fact that I am literally "on my own", with not much family contacts. This means no family members lounging around the house when I get home, no family members to chat with during dinner to catch up on how each and everyone's day went, no family members to bug, no family members bugging, no family member to fight with over the remote control/the computer/the landline. I guess this is fine and a lot of people probably envy me. It sounds cool after all, right?

Well, there are times when loneliness bites. More than anything else in this world, I truly miss the physical presence of Minyong. Wala lang. I miss popping up into their room when we used to live in Zaragoza Building and finding him on the bed, reading a newspaper. Or when I cross the sala from my room going to the kitchen, there he is flexibly seated on the sofa watching Noli De Castro dramatically announce a grandmother raped by her 16-year old druggie grandson on TV Patrol. Or I'd pretend to be asleep and hear my bedroom door open because he's conducting his nightly security check. When we moved into the new house in Alabang, I'd find him in his den drafting an article or catching up on his regular afternoon siesta. Or he'd be watching DVDs which he just bought with Nicollo from the Ruins. Otherwise, I'd catch him on the street cutting his bougainvilla or down in the basement garage, reving up his refurbished Mini Cooper. My Daddy... he's just very visible, easy to find.

Actually, since work is very hectic and I'm way too tired everytime I get home, I don't really feel much sadness. My dogs keep me busy and preoccupied. It's only during long weekends and non-working holidays that call for family gatherings that I get bitten. However, I thank God for my kumares whose families are kind enough to have me over with them.

Last Saturday, Oct.29, I got home early from work with no plans for the night. I just thought fuck, I'll just have to walk the dogs, watch tv, go online, and then sleep. Well here comes Adelaine inviting me for dinner at her place because it's her husband's birthday. How sweet. So I texted Gigi and we met up at Adelaine's. The whole Almeda clan, some of which are now my neighbors, welcomed me and immediately assissted me to the dinner table. I had brief occasions to chat with Flossie and Romel and watch Ninang Gigi play with Enzo. Adelaine was very hospitable and even packed away some lechon for me to bring home. Me and Gigi chatted until we felt it was time to retire to bed. I felt like family. It warmed my heart.

Here comes Sunday. At 4:00pm, I started to get ready to go to the cemetery to visit my mother and my lola's grave at Manila Memorial Park. My crew, comprised of Yaya Dadang, Chiquita, Pancho and Ringo were all geared up too. What used to be an annual thing of the Ordoñezes from Zaragoza Building has now changed with me as the Captain of the Ship headed for the cemetery. My passengers don't complain about how gloomy the weather is, or how bad the traffic is, how muddy it will be when we get there. That's what I used to do since I'm the whiner in the family. This time, I am the one taking charge. I am the one planning for the household on when we will be going to the cemetery. While in the car amidst the chaos of Undas, I am the one checking on my passengers if they're okay, telling them to hang on and be patient and that we're almost there. Just as we were about to enter the main gate of Manila Memorial, rain poured down. Fuck. Gotta make a U-turn and head back home. We'll probably have to go on Friday instead. It's another holiday anyways. I talked to my passengers again, apologized and explained why we had to go back. No complains heard, they're easy to deal with.

I decided to stop by Mommy's Pride Pancit Malabon along West Service Road and buy us some dinner takeout. While waiting, I can't help but stare at the Chocolate Cake, imagining how it would be nice to bring that to the Alvarezes for a feast over some hang and nonsense chitchat. Although I rarely hang at Maite's, I enjoy being there. Just because. So I texted Maite and asked if it was okay to hang at her place for the night. I tagged Gigi and Pancho along.

We got to Maite's and was welcomed at the door by Michael, with a wide grin on his face. Seated at the dinner table were her parents, playing solitaire. I gave the Cake to Maite and we all sat down. Shortly thereafter comes Guada and Pats checking out who just came in. Maite instantly cuts the cake and before you know it, us visitors and the whole Alvarez household are closely gathered at the main table. Tita Vickee starts convincing Gigi about the wonders of Virgin Coconut Oil. Meanwhile, I was busy interrogating Maite on her recent visit to Pats' dermatologist. I also compliment Pats on his smooth, radiant skin. In the background is still the mention of "omega 3 fatty acids" and "Ay naku, don't use canola oil, it's very unhealthy. Try Minola instead", "And you know what I just discovered, virgin coconut oil kills bad breath ha" and other technical stuff by Tita Vickee. Go Gigi, kaya mo yan. So that was our setup for a good 15 minutes. It was your typical chaotic family conversations. Afterwhich, Maite, Gigi and myself plopped onto the comfy couch and talked about chaz until again, it was time to go home and retire to bed. It was a home filled with laughter and warmth. It fed my lonesome soul.

Today, Oct.31, I am on holiday duty. 9am-6pm. Love my job. My celphone rings, screen flashing, "Daddy Calling". My heart smiles. "Oh Claudine, papunta kami kay Mommy Tinette ngayon." To which I reply, "Ah ok. Andito pa ako sa work ngayon, naka duty ako eh. Siguro mamayang gabi na ko pupunta, kasama ko si Dadang." Daddy says, "Ah ganun ba? O sige."

Again, I've just re-confirmed to myself that I'm really on my own now. Solo. On-my-own. I, me, myself. On most days, it's really not that bad. On few occasions, it pinches a bit. I'm sure I'll get used to this as the years will go on. And besides, who says I've lost family connections? With permission from my two closest friends, Claudine Almeda or Claudine Alvarez doesn't sound bad at all right? God Bless their hearts.

posted by Groove is in the Heart @ 8:36 AM 2 comments